Hiya bloggits

Well another post on another day in Delhi

There a few good piccies I missed out last post and though we should share

A very very worried woman jammed inbetween a brother and big sister on the hati in Kerela

, well I have to be nice after all. Just glad he managed to stay calm

But there again all the Delhi visitors have been suitable impressed by Mr Blenders managing to blag the 100rps ride in the middle of Delhi on the wedding hati's.

Well he is a Scotsman after all

Rajistan buskers did not make many $$$$'s from the stingy tourists but it was fun having a go

Was paid 20bucks to shut up

Mr Bhogal's brother, honest thats what he said in Hindi, well I think he did , I think I can see the resemblance, the hair , the smile perhaps or is it ?The Management at one of the parks just contemplating the next task to set Meanwhile

Between friends. What would you rather be without ?

Whisky or a woman?

It all depends on years / vintage !

A dude walks into a bar and says to the bartender : I want a 12 years old scotch, and don't try to fool me because I can tell the difference.

The bartender is sceptical and decides to try to trick the man with a 5 year old scotch.

The man takes a sip, scowls and says : "Hey - Bartender, this crap is 5 years old scotch. - I told you that I wanted a 12 years old."

The bartender won't give in and tries once more this time with a 8 year scotch.

The man takes a sip, grimaces and says : "Bartender, I do not want 8 years old scotch like this filth. Gi'me a 12-years old scotch or ill leave !"

Impressed, the bartender gives him the 12-year scotch on the house, the man takes a sip and sighs, " Ah, now that's the real thing. "

A disgusting, ugly, grimy, stinking drunk has been watching all this with great interest.

He stumbles over and sets a glass down in front of the man and says. : "Hey, I think that's really far out what you can do.

Try this one."...The man takes a sip and immediately spits out the liquid and cries, "Yechhh! This stuff tastes like piss!"

The drunk's eyes light up and he says, "Yeah sure, now how old am I ?"

Yuck

Namaste

Computer say no

He he bloggits

Well where in the world is Mr Blenders and Mrs Pimms and just what sort of adventures have they been up to recently?

Mrs Pimms big Sis , twinny sis , big bro and twinny the drugs shop owner , ok and janet paid a visit

We knew janet would enjoy India as she has many relatives here?

We normally see then walking down the middle of the road on all fours, but also seen in very green pastures , chewing the cud?

9 Days in Kerela for the clan or whatever it is you call a bunch of family

Followed up by a little visit to Jiaphur, Jhodpur minus Big Bro and Moo Moo "Janet" but Mr blenders took thier place

Best moments

1-Park in Jiaphur where a little girl on a swing was overheard by Mr Blender making some remarks and laughing at the "hati's" walking one behind the other. Oops

And there wasn't any elephants in the park!!

And now you know where "hati Jakes" gets her nickname for all those that remeber her

Like the water spout at the temple?

We prefer bottled

2-Arriving in India and enjoying a little bit of scottish country dancing at F603 in Gurgaon with a load of Indian and UK friends , surreal !!!

3-Drinking some foul tasting fermented coconut drink, yuck, yucj , yuck

4- The backwaters on a very BIG boat in kelela

5-Just India

Where next?

Jaiphur is worth the visit , lots more relics but not many gorras around at this time of the year

The Blue City or Sun City as the locals refer to it

Lots of sights along with electrifying beer that they sell all over India

A Little bit of Britain , or as we all laughed at " Little Britain was next

Jhodpur had 4 of us rolling around the floor after checking out and checking back into a hotel after we found out our flight was cancelled

Well you do not want to risk the taxi to Delhi at night , so we had to go back and finish the cocktail menu in the hotel

Fans of Little Britain will love this

Having asked for our old rooms back we were told by the girl behind reception after she puched a few keys, paused and punched a few more that that

"the computer says NO"

yep, we had to ask twice as fell about laughing the first time, and we did get different rooms

Next

Another Raj moment for everyone on the way to a little palace just outside the city

Amer to give it the correct pronunciation

Meanwhile, on our return we find out we have 1 lac of new pets on the "backside" balcony
What's a lac you ask , well click on the picture and start counting

100,000 Bees , bees and more bees, arranged to have the maintenance people around to apply a little heat to them when they were asleep. It worked and some fresh honeycomb on toast for breakfast

Bit of a blackened balcony roof and masses of little black blobs on the lawn 6 floors down though

Lastly or for now we have the backside of the post

Indian liquor manufacturers have accepted the Health India suggestion that the following warning labels be placed immediately on all varieties of alcohol containers:

WARNING: The consumption of alcohol may leave you wondering what the hell happened to your bra and panties.

WARNING: The consumption of alcohol may make you think you are whispering when you are not.

WARNING: The consumption of alcohol is a major factor in dancing like a retard.

WARNING: The consumption of alcohol may cause you to tell your friends over and over again that you love them.

WARNING: The consumption of alcohol may cause you to think you can sing..

WARNING: The consumption of alcohol may lead you to believe that ex-lovers are really dying for you to telephone them at four in the morning.

WARNING: The consumption of alcohol may make you think you can logically converse with members of the opposite sex without spitting.

WARNING: The consumption of alcohol may create the illusion that you are tougher, smarter, faster and better looking than most people.

WARNING: The consumption of alcohol may lead you to think people are laughing WITH you.

WARNING: The consumption of alcohol may cause pregnancy.

WARNING: The consumption of alcohol may be a major factor in getting your ass kicked.

WARNING: the crumsumpten of alchol may Mack you tink you kan type reel gode.

and finally

HOW A MAN CAN IMPRESS A WOMAN

Compliment her, cuddle her, kiss her, caress her, love her, stroke her, tease her, comfort her, protect her, hug her, hold her, spend money on her, dine her, buy things for her, listen to her, care for her, stand by her, support her and go to the ends of the earth for her.

HOW A WOMAN CAN IMPRESS A MAN

Show up naked or Bring Whisky.

Nanitieeeeeeeese, hick

Mr Blender and Mrs Pimms

Pimp My Rickshaw

Yep , thats correct this week's blog is about the little multi purpose all terain vehicles in use around India , and many other places around the globe

One of these magic machines

But for the ultimate you have to try this one http://www.spike.com/video/pimp-my-rickshaw/2743207

Rickshaw serviRaj Kumar Kaushal's clients may not be able to afford their own chauffeur but his first class rickshaw service offers them the next best thing.

So far the Indore-based driver in India's Madhya Pradesh state has spent more than 400 US dollars on refurbishing his vehicle. His modifications have made his auto-rickshaw one of the most luxurious on India's roads.

==========================================

Tech Spec for the really intrested, (Boring)

The rickshaw is an awe-inspiring mode of transport to be sure. What could possibly be more reliable and comfortable on India’s atrocious pothole-ridden roads?
The Statistics:
Engine:2 stroke, single cylinder, forced air cooled
Engine Size: 145.45cc, the .45cc makes all that difference we are told
Power:7 HP at 5000 rpm , yep noisy
Torque: 12.17 Nm at 3500 rpm
Transmission: 4 forward, 1 reverse
Brakes: Hydraulic expanding shoe
Fuel Capacity: 8 ltr inc. 1.4 reserve
Top speed: 55kmph (I've seen more, especially down hill)
Weight: 277kg

====================================

And what do people do with these in India , well apart from the everyday transport they have a twice a year race over the Indian sub-continent , never the same route though

Anyone mad enough to try then log into http://rickshawrun.theadventurists.com/

All sold out this year though so maybye 2009 ?

The Rickshaw Run is a simple if crazy concept. With very little preparation and even less luggage, 70 teams will race along the atrocious roads of the Indian subcontinent on 145cc rickshaws. In other words, for the summer 2008 you will be haring 2,500 odd miles from Kathmandu (Nepal) down to Pondicherry (just south of Chennai) on a machine similar to a lawnmower.
Although it’s a twice-yearly event, the route changes each time. Sadly, however, road conditions do not improve. And as anyone who paid attention in GCSE Geography will know, summer time is monsoon season in India. This means we’ll be racing on a machine with a spluttering top speed of 40mph (downhill with the wind behind ) in sticky torrential rain. What a splendid idea.
The aim is to finish within two weeks, although it may well take two years. There is no support nor backup vehicles and no guarantee people will make it. But it will be an adventure and one which people are hoping will raise lots of cash for two very worthy charities.

Only in India folks

Namaste

16 things I have learnt in life

16 THINGS THAT IT TOOK ME OVER 50 YEARS TO LEARN from GOM


1. Never, under any circumstances, take a sleeping pill and a laxative on the same night.


2. If you had to identify, in one word, the reason why the human race has not achieved, and never will achieve, its full potential, that word would be "."


3. There is a very fine line between "hobby" and "mental illness."


4.People who want to share their religious views with you almost never want you to share yours with them.


5. You should not confuse your career with your life.


6. Nobody cares if you can’t dance well. Just get up and dance.


7. Never lick a steak knife.


8. The most destructive force in the universe is gossip.


9. You will never find anybody who can give you a clear and compelling reason why we observe daylight savings time.


10. You should never say anything to a woman that even remotely suggests that you think she’s pregnant unless you can see an actual baby emerging from her at that moment.


11. There comes a time when you should stop expecting other people to make a big deal about your birthday. That time is age 21.


12. The one thing that unites all human beings, regardless of age, gender, religion, economic status or ethnic background, is that, deep down inside, we ALL believe that we are above average drivers.


13. A person, who is nice to you, but rude to a waiter, is not a nice person.



14. Your friends love you anyway.


15. Never be afraid to try something new. Remember that a lone amateur built the Ark. A large group of professionals built the Titanic.


16. I will let you add yours in a comment

Namaste

Sunday papers

Hiya Romanticgers

Well this one is about a section in the sunday papers
A whole insert is dedicated to it and raises a little smile for the attempts to get a partner

Online Marriage Ads - Enjoy
Who knows one of these might be your one!!!!

( Honest person but getting desperate )
Hello To Viewvers My Name is Shobin , I am single i dont have Famale, Ifany one whant to marrie to me u can visite to my home. I am not a goodeducation but i working all field in bangalroe.. if u like me u welcome tomy heart... when ever u whant to meet pls viset my resident or send uletter.. Thanks yours Regards Shobin

( Cleaner , cook and washer wanted )
I want very simple girl. from brahmin educated family from orissa state heis also know about RAMAYAN, GEETA BHAGABATA, and other homework

( A family guy)
She should be good looking and should have a service. She Shoulsd have onebrother and one sister. She should be educated.

(Fancies himself)
I am a happy-go-lucky kind of person. Enjoys every moments of life. I loveto make friendship. Becauese friendship is a first step of love. I amlooking for my dreamgirl who will love me more than i. Because i lovemyself a lot. If u think that is u then why to late come on ........ holdmy hand forever !!!

(Problem solver)
I am simple boy.I have lot ofproblemin mylife because ofmylucknow iamlooking onegirlshe caremeandloveme lot lot lot

( Mmm, no jeans outside )
I want a girl with no drinks if she wants she can wear jeans in house butwhile steping out of house she should give recpect to our cast

( Lough so much he forgot no 3 )
HYE I AM A GOOD LOKING GUY,WHO HAS THE CAPABILITY TO MAKE ANY BODY TO LOUGH.I BELIEVE IN GOD AND ACCORDING TO ME FRIENDS ARE THE REAL MESSENGER OF GOD. THE 3 THINGS I AM LOOKING FROM A GIRL ,THEY ARE
1.THEY MUST BELIEVE IN GOD.
2. THEY HAVE TO LIKE MY PROFFESION AND THEY SHOULD NOT GET BORED WITH ME WHEN I WILL TRY TO MAKE THEM LOUGH.

(Not got a clue what this one is all about )
Whatever she may be but she should feel that she is going to be someonebride and she must think of the future life if she is toolike this shewould bde called the lady of the lamp

( Ok, )
I love my patner i marriage the patner ok i search my patner and i love thepatner ok thik hai the patner has a graduate ok

( Complity rules ko)
I iam pradip my family histoy my two brother two sister and fater&mothersister complity marred

(desperately seeking someone , pleeeeaaaasssseeee)
My name is farhan and i am unmarried. pleaes you marrige me pleaes pleaespleaes pleaes pleaes pleaes pleaes

(Gi for it girls)
I want one girl who love me or my mother. she love me heartly or she haveafrank she's skin colour 'normal'not a black or not a whitey. IThink themain think is heart if your heart is beautiful then you are beautiful. butiam not a handsome person or not a good looking. but my Mom say that Iam agood person. My father already expired . iam ''AEKLAUTA''. THE CHOICE ISYOUR. bye bye.

( Seeking nins)
I AM LITTLE FAIR INDIAN COLOUR. I DON'T HAVE ANY HABIT.

( Contraditions)
Hello i am a good charactarised man. i want to run my life happily.idivorced my first wife.her charactor is not good'. i expect the good mindedand clean habits girl who may be in the same caste or other caste accepted...

( Two minds about that one)
My colour is black,but my heart is white.i like social service

( Ok have you got that )
To be married on jan-2005. working woman perferable

(Help!!!)
Ssc failed three times and worked with privated ltd company which notpaying salary at present.

A bit more humour to finish
A teacher asks her class, "If there are 5 birds sitting on a fence and you shoot one of them, how many will be left?"
She calls on little Billy.
He replies, "None, they will all fly away with the first gunshot."
The teacher replies, "The correct answer is 4, but I like your thinking."
Then little Billy says, "I have a question for you. "
"There are 3 women sitting on a bench having ice cream:
One is delicately licking the sides of the triple scoop of ice cream.
The second is gobbling down the top and sucking the cone.
The third is biting off the top of the ice cream.
Which one is married?"
The teacher, blushing a great deal, replies, "Well, I suppose the one that's gobbled down the top and sucked the cone."
To which Little Billy replied, "The correct answer is 'the one with the wedding ring on, ' but I like your thinking."

Namaste

Visitations and Holi

Hello colourful blogeaders



Well Mrs Pimms Big sis , twinnie sis and brother inlaw , the one into drugs ( chemist or something like that ) pay another visit to India



First stop for the lady's had to be the nail spa for the compulsory manicure, pedicure , head, feet arms, legs and back massage , phew thats a mouthfull!!






Well Mr Pimms and the chemist went elesewhere as our nails are ok


Where?


Well inside Delhi there was another old relic to visit


This time we go way back in time to 1321 , when Ghiyas-ud-din Tughlaq built his little city , well this is one of the 7 cities that make up Delhi
6.5 km walls and a citadel with a passage to another fort in the distance , even has a tomb over the road




Only took 4 years and its a pretty impressive place to visit ,no tourists , only us local Indians and a ratio of 3 guides to two of us on the tour is pretty good going


Who was this guy?



Well look it up , I had too !!! Do I have to do everything here!!! He he






Mr Blender did manage to find the "Holy Grail" at the fort by following the shining beam of light
The guides told us it was the prisons , but we thought it was more like the granaries as all interconnected with holes in the roof for ventilation

As for the grail?

It now sits in the drawing room at F603 hotel , an amazing find

The other poeple were not at the fort but just on the way from/to school and I thought you might like the piccie

What's next , well meanwhile its Holi this weekend and in true lets get in the party mood Mr Blenders joins , no, starts the activity and ends up worse off for it, well perhaps the Dhobi Fairy can work his magic on the shirt and the jeans

Who is the dhobi fairy?

Well remember when you were little and mum and dad tricked you with the tooth fairy and a sixpence( 1 pound if you are under 26 -Liz and Ian)

Here in India it happens to Mr Blenders clothes, pants and all

Finish work and strip off ( mmm I heard you say, well some of you?) . Throw your clothes in the washing bin and heh presto , the next day you find them hanging up in the wardrobe , washed and neatly pressed?

Might be the same fairy as the one who does my shoes

Mr Blenders doesn't know how the Dhobi happens when Mrs Pimms is away, but it does.

Might have something to do with getting up at 06:30 to let the housekeeper in but who knows ?

More on meanwhile and another day out

Our visitors felt the heat , well old blighty is suffering from a usual wet and windy spring , so we hear

Having seen Humayans tomb in the past we paid a visit to Purana Qila, all the way to 1538.

Humayan plunged to his death in the library in this Delhi city or as the papers say today " the deceased was brought in dead"

We were told he was struck first with a candlestick by Mrs White but can't confirm this as the other guy said it was Miss Scarlet but he then he did claim to be Anthony E. Pratt, a solicitor's clerk and part-time clown from Birmingham?

Now there's a thing a Pratt invented Cluedo, well well

Well Namaste for now and happy Holi

Now where's my clean shirt ?

Well it is sunday

Hi Bloddieeeee hot bloggites

Yep Delhi is now in summer time weather , well when its 28 at night it has to be

Sorry the old Uk but you have to put up with it , or move !!!!

Well whats on this week ?

To start I have to say strange goings on in goa ?

Seems like a big issue out here at the moment

Well I think who would leave a 15 year old behind, asking for trouble knowing the hormones of this age

Sorry for what happened but hew parents take a grip and look after your offsping for life , yep , life

Well you did bring them into this world and they hopefully will see you out of it, but sadly in this event not so very true

Thats the best thing about being a mum and a dad , seeing then grow up and take thier own responsibility when they are ready?

Yep a question mark as to when they are ready, a tough call for any parent

Now 15 is not ready in our book

17 is ok but still you have to make the call

I have not read the Uk press but its a sin to leave them before they `can manage to stand on their own two feet , nomatter who you leave your kids with

Well thats it with that and what have we been doing this week?

Went shopping today to the local M&S mall , our corner shop

A fantastic Indian came up and said hello Neil , how are you today

Oh and Mary , looking forward to the spinning classes ?

Well , does this happen in the UK I ask ?

We joined fitness first , this was one of the trainers

Its opening on the 14 of April we are told

Just a short walk to our local shopping mall and 4 floors up

"my god" as tristian whould say

But here agian these people will push us with spinning and latin dancing to keep us in shape , no put us more in shape

What else have we seen this week

Well Indians do not like to que so the challenge is always on to let them know we are in front of you

Now shopkeepers are normarly pretty good at dealing with this but when they dont we have to but in, it gets intant result and large smiles all around when we do

Manners are a little bit differnent here in India but having a white face helps to difuse many an event ?

What about the humour you ask, wel Kam did get the jokes this week on his own e-mail, ask him

Well whre are you jokes , little bit more comments to see if you do?

Well I need you to provide that for us, any style would be nice

Reason being as we would love you input

Any jokes , any links just feel free

Otherwise it will stay as a samll family blog and I want it to sell India for all our friends and I know you want more!

Ps: Piccie is the back of Ambience , though it needs to rain to keep it green

Well Namste everyone

phew !!

Hi Bikers

Gurgaon is still here and this week I be mostly talking about Bicycles

Yep the two wheeled human powered version but in in India they have many uses apart form getting from A to B

43.2% of the polulation own a bicyle here in India and they use them in many ways

I have a theory here for the large bicyle that we see on the street

Well the bicycle saddle to ground level are all designed to be just a little more then the average indian, so his feet can't touch the ground

Why is this we ask?

Picture the scene

The egg shop delivery

All that is required is a bycycle with a rack at the back , someone who's your average height indian , one hero bicycle and 12 trays , yes trays of eggs

Load eggs one tray on top of the other , 12 trays seem the recomended load , but this may be cost driven , or some sort of risk analysis that determined the totals

Next climb onboard the bike and place your feet on the pedals

Then the shop /farm/ distributer pushes the whole lot into the Gurgaon traffic

Now there is no stopping till you reach the final destination where someone can help you get off the bike and save all the eggs

No wonder its crazy at the roads with all these people cycling with commodities on the bike.

Namaste bikers

Scorchio , well better than it has been

Hello Bloggites



Well another update on what we are up to , no piccies as back online on new computer



Weather has turned for the better and Mr Blenders Chillies are shooting up, well he was getting withdrawal symptoms not growing anything last year .
Have two types , hot and really hot on the scoville scale

Just wait till these go into the rajma , a special one to take to work for everyone to sample
Will be very Indian


Meanwhile Mrs Pimms has taken to rugmaking , just to keep busy in the day
Sounds like the type of this for serious therapy , perhaps it is, well that is when she is not too busy with the gym, nailspa, shopping in M&S, tea and tiffin around the network, life is very tough for some people.


Vinod our new housekeeper is cooking some excellent saturday night dishes , chillie chicken this weekend, and poor us just sit until dinner is served , eat and sit again, as not allowed to do anything , he says its his job. Just look what we will miss in years to come


We even have a new Guard on our appartment block, 100% for the coming to attention detail he gave us the other night after dancing the night away at a scotish get together. Life makes you smile at the simplest things.


And last another top ten

1-Circle the stain in permanent pen, so that when you remove the garment from the washing machine you can easily locate the area of the stain And check that it has gone.

2-Don't waste money buying expensive binoculars. Simply stand next to the object you wish to view.

3-Always poo at work. Not only will you save money on toilet paper, but you'll also be getting paid for it.

4-Weight watchers. Avoid that devilish temptation to nibble at a chocolate bar in the cupboard or fridge by not buying the king thing in the first place, you fat barsteward

5-Recreate the fun of a visit to a public swimming pool in your home by filling the bath with cold water, adding two bottles of bleach, then urinating into it, before jumping in.

6-Anorexics. When your knees become fatter than your legs, start eating cake again.

7-An empty aluminium cigar tube filled with angry wasps makes an inexpensive vibrator.

8-Olympic athletes. Disguise the fact that you've taken steroids by running a bit slower.

9-Smokers. Save on matches and lighters, by simply lighting your next fag from the butt of your last one.

9 again -Vegetarians coming to dinner? Simply serve them a nice bit of steak or veal. Since they're always going on about how tofu, Quorn, meat substitute etc 'tastes exactly like the real thing', they won't know the difference.

9 and a quarter -Invited by vegetarians for dinner? Point out that since you'd no doubt be made aware of their special dietary requirements, tell them about yours, and ask for a nice steak.

9 and a little bit -High blood pressure sufferers. Simply cut yourself and bleed for a while, thus reducing the pressure in your veins.

9 ish -Heavy smokers. Don't throw away those filters from the end of your cigarettes. Save them up and within a few years you'll have enough to insulate your roof.

Yep 9 again -Corsa drivers. Attach a lighted sparkler to the roof of your car before starting a long journey. You drive the things like dodgems anyway, so It may as well look like one.

Nearly 10 -A mouse trap placed on top on of your alarm clock will prevent you from rolling over and going back to sleep.

Very Nearly 10 -Fool next door into thinking you have more stairs than them by banging your feet twice on each stair.
10-.6At supermarket checkouts a Toblerone box makes a handy 'Next customer Please' sign for dyslexic shoppers.

10-0.5- Girls. Don't worry about a nice dress for that important first date. All he's interested in is seeing you naked.

10 at last- Putting just the right amount of gin in your goldfish bowl makes the fishes' eyes bulge and cause them to swim in an amusing manner.

Namaste

Slingapora

Hello Slogites

Well a visit to a very modern metropolis , just to eat the Chillie Crab and drink Tiger Beer
And a little bit of shopping thrown in
Bumped into a couple of friends away on their travels around the globe
Who let them away from the close all the way to Singapore.
Was really nice to see A&J for the few days in the far east

To start we managed to find this handy road








Mrs Pimms and Mrs A caught sight of the right place to shop for all those essential items








Didn't do them in the right size, so went off to do the sightseeing bit instead








Aha Singapore , lots of places to shop and eat and the roads are not too busy

Got back to India on the wednesday and straight into the meeting for our big night out on saturday, hence slow to upload the blogie thingy
Delhi Cali society annual Burns night Jig with about 70 kilted scotsmen out for a night
Only had just over 200 at this Black tie and kilted night in the Hyatt and the reply to the laddies was the best laugh we have heard for ages , have my doubts on was this a lassie or a laddie
And I thought you only say this in Boogie Street in Singapore
Have to be a Navy man to understand that

Both Mr & Mrs P suffered with aches and pains as were never it seems off the dancefloor
We must be getting better at this scottish dancing as remembered lots more

Meanwhile, we visited the Aussie High Commision and was reminded of the 2008 wall calendar I meant to share with everyone , mmm strange people around ?

To finish though a learn from your mistakes picture




Namaste

Hi

Well Hi Readers

As you are reading this we will be in yet another country
Again for Mr B and a first for Mrs P

Singapore for a long weekend, meeting up with friends for some drunk prawns, yum yum
A weekend of chillie crabs and lots of fish as learnt our lesson of do not eat fish in Delhi, unless you wish to loose lots of weight that is. The things people do!

Meanwhile back in Delhi
The new road has opened now cutting journey time down for lots of commuters between Gurgaon and Delhi, well that stretch anyway , all this raod building just moves the traffic along to another place to wait. Progress?
Lane driving is not a thing thats common here in India and it is normal to see people on the inside lane turning right and people on the outside taking the next left, driving skills take on a force India team skillset so we think this is the team to watch out for in the future for F1 racing ?

What seems very strange is that they built a very long 4 lane highway but it does not have many places for people to cross, now that gets very interesting when Mr B drives at the weekends
All these people running to cross the road, playing paper , stone or scissors .
Have even seen a cow , well its allowed out here, missed the camels on the way to the parade today though .

Well short and to the point but have to go to sleep as up early for the flight to seafood and indulge for the weekend.

Raffles and singapore slings are calling

Namaste

Next breaking news is they are about to bring out a tax on all animals , yep you have to pay 500rps for your pooch now , oh and 1000 for the bullock that pulls the cart along
Again the voice of progress is at work

Monkey see , monkey do

Hello Bloggies

Mr B is meant to be moving into a new office on the 2nd of Jan but it keeps going backwards
I guess its many excuses but the best has to be because of the monkeys!
Nope not the Pop group for you people in the sixties but the real type
Yes all go Ahhh, no Arhhh

Yep a nice two floor, nearly finished new palace , that has had a few nightly hoodlums pay a visit and its another day off schedule.
Why off schedule you ask well what else when the trashed the false ceiling

Now Mr Blenders says he does not want monkeys in Engineering, he's told his boss , well who would.He does know of a frog in another Airline though, so who knows

Meanwhile Mrs Pimms is really busy at the natural , all day scrub down spa in Gurgaon
Two weeks of pure bliss , being scrubbed and massaged by two Kerala ladies, that joined with the poison yuck to take for a fortnight and all in the pursuit of the thinner body . Well India offers so much !

Meanwhile we still visit the cruel man in the gym as and when we can , honest this keep fit stuff works says Mr B , well that and no or very little beer along with the right Indian diet .
Here's the chart that just proves it , all the slips are the visits back to the UK but we will both reach our own targets. Mr B is pretty pleased with 18.5 to 14.6 in 15 months though, trim , fit and more than ready for the many years of our adventure in life.
Mr Cruel man in the gym (Krishna) always says afterwards, do we feel good to work out and we have to agree its good, told you India offers so much!!!

What else apart from Monkeys and being fit people?

Well you have the motor show over here at the moment and Tata's goal has been launched
A car for just over a lac, whats that you ask?
A lac is 100,000 rups
Yep , thats right , well after taxes ext will be around £1250, but you can buy a television for that , can't you, or a holiday?
India is coming up as this is the car for the common people , just like the Airline we work for, generating an economy for a global leader. Just watch us grow.
Yep the Nano has been launched out here , but we have to wait a while till its in the showrooms, and on the streets

Well , what do you think?
I think there could be a market elsewhere too, but it will cost you lots more.
Meanwhile Mr B has his eyes on an Indian driving licence and a Bullet!

The roads just got even more of a stressful time for the driver. Not Mr B or Mrs P as its always ok in the back seat.

Mr B thinks it should have bullbars all, round, BIG rubber ones like dogems cars as we know what its like in the delhi traffic
Well the signs say it allNamaste all our readers

Hellooooo

Hi Bloggies
Well its been a while
Since we have been here that is, 3 years 2006/7 and now its 8
I know slightly cheating but who cares
Its Mr B's Birthday soon and thought he could share a few things as a list

Congratulations

Born in the 60’s were you , well only just ?

All this thanks to GOM website , ta its so true

• First, we survived being born to mothers who smoked and/or drank while they carried us around for those 9 months.
• They took aspirin, ate blue cheese dressing, tuna from a tin, liver pate and didn’t get tested for diabetes. All the foods back on the menu out here so must be healthy!
• Then after that trauma, our baby cots were covered with bright coloured lead-based paints.
• We had no childproof lids on medicine bottles, doors or cabinets and when we rode our bikes, we had no helmets.
• As children, we would ride in cars with no seat belts or air bags or in a transit van – loose in the back – yippeeeeeee, ouch!
• We drank water from the stream and NOT from a bottle. Then we found the dead sheep in the stream, half way up the hill, toilet phone in use shortly after.
• We shared one fizzie drink with four friends, from one bottle/ never had tins and NO ONE actually died from this. Well it was medicine 70 shillings and some lager stuff
• We ate cakes, white bread and real butter and drank pop with sugar in it, but we weren’t overweight because......

WE WERE ALWAYS OUTSIDE PLAYING!!

• We would leave home in the morning and play all day, as long as we were back for tea , then out again to play till bedtime, only to sneak out again till you got really tired .
• No one knew where we were or what we got up to, well until we got caught that was.
• We would spend hours building our go-carts out of scraps and then ride down the hill, only to find out we forgot the brakes. After running into the bushes a few times, we learned to solve the problem .
• We did not have Playstations, Nintendo’s, X-boxes, no video games at all, no 99 channels on cable, no DVD’s, no MP3’s no surround sound, no mobile phones, no text messaging, no personal computers, no Internet or Internet chat rooms........... Bit we had the loudest sterio to play 45s and albums on. Remember them, now who was you favourite, Wizard, Slade, Stones, Floyd or Ian Dury? Mr B was and is still is very varied on this subject, I feel another blog coming along some time ?
• WE HAD FRIENDS and we went outside and found them!
• We fell out of trees,swam in icy cold water, climbed hills and got cut, broken bones and teeth, there were no lawsuits from these accidents .
• We played with worms and mud pies made from dirt, and the worms did not live in us forever.
• Made up games with big sticks and tennis balls and although we were told it would happen, we did not poke out any eyes.
• We rode bikes or walked to a friend’s house and knocked on the door or rang the bell, or just yelled for them! There mums always made us a cup of tea or if lucky a tin of beer
• Not everyone made the team. Those who didn’t had to learn to deal with disappointment. Imagine that!! Well when you only had 11 people that were in the primary school you actually did make the team and we even won the cup that year
• The idea of a parent bailing us out if we broke the law was unheard of. They actually sided with the law! And the law were very . very , very BIG people where I came from, sort of eclipse of the sun effect when they stood in the front door . Oh how to learn by a little mistake
We had freedom, failure, success and responsibility, and we learned

HOW TO DEAL WITH IT ALL!

mmm , are you one of these people from the 60's, did you learn?

Sorry DC , your's is probably a little bit different as born in the 50's, or is it as so close?

Namaste, oh and wish DC a H, H, H, Happy Birthday for Saturday, have a laddie on us.

Its warming up

Hi Blogits

Well Delhi Winter is passing and the temp meant Mr Belnder did not need an undershirt under his overshirt.

Been settling in with a new housekeeper for the last couple of weeks
Mrs Pimms is back to growing her nails, massages and shopping

Vinod comes 6 days a week to take care care of all the hard work
in keeping the flat clean , and has he made it spotless , well till
we open the balcony door and the dust settles again
he's cooking us chilli chicken and egg fried rice tonight , but before that he's cleaning up, dusting, sweeping and making the bed
Life is tough for Mrs P.

Well whats on this weekend then
Bonfire night here in India tomorrow night,

Bonfire Celebration

Despite icy wind, the festive mood of Lohri is keep its warmth owing to its Bonfire celebration. It is an accepted fact that this festival is to worship fire. Lohri is not a religious festival, but a celebration marking the end of an intense winter and it also celebrates the sowing of the rabi crop. It celebrates the arrival of the new month and the new season and is a festival of happiness and anybody new in the family adds to it's fervor.

Every year, Lohri falls on 13th January and right through the bitter winter day, men, women and children go around collecting dry twigs and branches to make a bonfire. The bigger the bonfire the better is Lohri celebration. Come evening and the bonfire is lighted with family and neighbors singing and dancing around it.
The fire indicates the spark of life and prayers are said for goodwill and abundant crops. People gather round the bonfire and say prayers, and this is usually followed by dancing.

Huge bonfires are lit in the harvested fields and in the front yards of houses and people gather around the rising flames, circle around (parikrama) the bonfire and throw puffed rice, popcorn and other munchies into the fire, shouting "Aadar aye dilather jaye" (May honor come and poverty vanish!), and sing popular folk songs.
During the parikrama it is traditional to throw popcorn, til, peanuts and jaggery into the fire.
These are healthy winter foods and til is also considered to be holy.

Punjabi celebrate Lohri every year with great enthusiasm as it is a festival of joy and it also heralds spring. Also, sowing of a crop is always a reason to celebrate in Punjab, where the majority of the population is into agriculture.
People enthusiastically participate in the dancing that is held around the bonfire.
Bhangra dance by men begins after the offering to the bonfire. Dancing continues till late night with new groups joining in amid the beat of drums. Traditionally, women do not join Bhangra.

So thats Mrs P on no dancing tomorrow night then. Have to keep her off the G&T

Namaste

well well

Hi Indigers

What on this week, well its photo shoot with the doorman in Agra , he's nearly as tall as me but not as slim?
Had our usual weekend gym sessions and back to where we were before the holiday season. Yippee , so new target is for 7 lbs in 8 weeks.
Surprising after all the cocktails Mrs Pimms had on the beach , oh and the beer a young and slightly older Mr Blenders had !!


Haircut week and Mr B still didn't manage to get under the banyan tree, had to go to Habibs instead.
His stylist in one of the local shopping places
Now a haircut here in India is very different from one in the UK
Apart from the haircut you get a head, neck , back and arm massage thrown in, if you want to be pummeled and kneeded that is. Feel very refreshed afterwards
I think you come away with something else if you have it under the tree.
Have actually seen one under an electricity pylon but that is only for punks who want a spiky haircut

New housekeeper has started and life is easy again
He has sorted out all the kitchen just the way he likes it, so now we can't find anything
Cleaned , cleaned and cleaned to make Mrs Pimms blush following her stint as housekeeper
She quit as the pay and perks were getting too much for her
Mr Blender now has the shiny shoes every morning and we are both not allowed to do anything around the house as its Vinod's job he says
Even cooks once a week , Indian, oriental, european, veg and meat.
Mrs pimms says he's a bit of a dish , mmmmm

Session on for Mrs P this week on the weight loss Aryvida fortnight
14 days of massages , manicures , pedicures , steam baths , hot oils and some yucky stuff to have before meals, dont think there is nay of this though , well Jo had to do it before whe went home

Namaste

Well where did we go next

Hi again Delhiite readers

Yep when you visit India you just have to go once
Well twice for Mr B
No three times for Mrs P

Agarraaaaaaaa
What a dirty city compared to Gurgaon
Up very , very , very early for the Taj Express and a taxi to what looks like a sleeping hostel for the Delhi poor at the train station. Hassle but never too much as at this time of the year there are lots or tourists to pick on
The train thing is really good , if not for the time. Stop on the platform at the digital C2 carraige sign and it stops to pick you up
Newspaper each when you are sat down , bottle of railway water ( sealed) and a cup of chai followed up by veggie breakfast. Just under 3 hrs and here's Agarrraaaaa!!!
Bit off putting all the people having a morning constitutional on the railway track as you pull into the station. The return journey was only 425rps each , so you have to keep smiling

First tour was the city outside Agra . Fatehphur Sikri
Built by Akbar as a monument to his rule and bolster the Mohgul empire
Oh and its not true he left it because of lack of water
He just moved on after 14 years to build his empire elsewhere
Here we are having a debate although not on religion as Akbar tried to have eveyone believe in just one god

mrs pimms has been reading
fiction in the era and read about a game of chess with elepahnts and real people in this courtyard. A few people having a peek around to find the concubines and the eunichs Life was tough I guess? Being a ruler

Next lunch at a loverly little tour ist cafe for veggie lunch outside
Was nice food and a little break before the trip back to Agaraaaaaa!




Well next day its off to one of the wonders of the world, again
Taj, for 4 please

youve heard about this place before so I don't have to say much more
Really busy in december though come out in Nov or Feb/Mar and you will miss a few crowds
Finished off in the red fort and a tour of the shops
Warning to everyone , dont buy at the places the guides take you as yolu will only pay over the odds for anything , no matter what they say. We dont and find some smashing things for what we think is worth paying.

Namaste

Merry 2008

Well happy 2008 bloggitts

How was your xmas celebrations then?
Where did you go and what did you do ?

Well, we had to suffer down in Goa , well just look at the temperature , the suffering happend back in Delhi, oh and on the ramp in Goa for Mr Blenders on his last day while everyone else stayed by the pool.

Mr Blenders had been here before and they made us so welcome
A young Mr Blenders and his girlfriend out to relax for a chrimbo break

Even the barman remembered him for some strange reason !!
Only one lump of ice in his drinks.

Well young Mr blenders got all brave and tried a little beach flight
Lasted all of 5 mins but it brought a smile to his face
We did ask
What happens if the boat breaks down , you get wet
What happens if the parachute fails, you get wet
It seemed every question was answered with you get wet , Sir

Never mind as it doesn't take long to get dry

Meanwhile, back with the beach bums, well the cleaner version
Took a trip to the hippy market to not , repeat not buy a drum despite many people trying to sell us one for 50rps eventually

Mrs Pimms did procure a craft bedspread to keep us warm back in Delhi. Bargaining was fun and the buyers and seller had a good session getting the best for an Indian price and Mr B has another elephant on the bed , oops hope Mrs P doesn't read that! Namaste